President Bush today asked Nasa to undertake a dramatic search and rescue mission for the man on the moon.

Missing in action. Presumed American.

He told close aides that he was concerned for the man's welfare, and reiterated his policy to ensure that no fallen (American) comrades be left behind "wheresoever that may be."

It's understood that the President's move was motivated after he listened to REM's Greatest Hits twelve times in a row following on from a DVD marathon with his brother Jed in which they watched the whole of Band of Brothers back to back.

A White House spokesman denied that the President's decision was a product of tiredness, telling us instead that "The President believes that REM are sending him secret messages through their music".

When we questioned the wisdom of basing policy on the lyrics of some old - and at times fairly mediocre and overrated - middle aged rock music, we were politely asked to leave by the Shiny Happy People.

The President is currently understood to be Nightswimming in Texecana. He is not losing his religion, and nor is he gardening at night. He is however World Leader Pretend.

Posted by damian at October 13, 2004 07:41 PM | TrackBack