As always, it was the Americans started it. They introduced baseball, basketball and other sports for the 1996 Atlanta Olympics that they knew they were going to win, or at least that they *should* have won, and ever since each Olympic hosting nation has done the exact same thing.

With that in mind, Mr Damian looks at the ten sports Britain will most likely introduce when it hosts the 2012 Olympics - sports which Britannia continues to rule the world in. Well, within reason.

Top 10 New Sports for the 2012 London Olympics

1: Binge drinking
2: Cricket (Australia are barred from this event)
3: Queueing
4: Tennis (Australia and all other countries - GB aside - are banned from this event)
5: Badger Baiting

Everybody knows Badger loves masterbation

6: British Bulldog
7: French Hating (Australian's welcome)
8: Cheese rolling
9: Welly throwing
10: Having casual unprotected sex with a swarthy Greek man after drinking ten bottles of 20/20.

Just call him Stellios. Or Jesus.

I know I did.

Posted by damian at July 13, 2005 03:28 PM